Sick of living this life.

Disgusted that I'm forced to live with this body.
Disgusted that I know that one day i will die, without ever have seen myself in a mirror.
Without ever have seen a picture of me.
I am so fed up and frustrated with every one just saying hey just cheer up everything will be fine and awesome.... no, it won't.
I would like having the ability to have some sort of intimate relation to another girl. but that won't happen.
I Would like to actually feel the shape of my body, and get the feeling that this, this is me.
But its ok not everyone can live happy I guess.